When the order to move on comes, the warrior looks at all the friends he has made during the time that he followed the path. He taught some to hear the bells of a drowned temple; he told others stories around the fire.
The heart is sad, but he knows that his sword is sacred and that he must obey the orders of the One to whom he offered to his struggle.
Then the warrior thanks his traveling companions, takes a deep breath and continues on, laden with memories of an unforgettable journey.
Manual of the Warrior of light by Paulo Coelho
Updates from May, 2007 Hide threads | Keyboard Shortcuts
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just writing……………..
Zadexpress
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Numbed….
Zadexpress
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अविनाशी पौडेल
Oh !
I m numbed too. Speechless. Frozen. God! wish it’s just not true…. -
Plain Jane
Oh dear lord..I am crying one more time again. I feel the huge void..can’t even imagine what it must be for you.
I was thinking of you the other day. What you must be doing..how you must be doing. I am so sorry. I am so so sorry. Wish I could change back time too. It shouldn’t have happened. This is not the way it should be.
I remember her helping us get ready for our parties..i remember helping her with the mehendi the day day before her big day. I remember talking to her and admiring her for just her. It’s hard to believe all that has just remained as a memory now.
I wish I could comfort you here. Tell you everything will be alright..but I can’t dare say that. The void…the lonliness. I can only imagine.
The next time I see you…I hope we can hug. Maybe I can share a lil’ bit of your pain.
Take care there,,,and I hope the memories will stop haunting you and provide you with a way to heal…
Hugs.. -
KALI
wish life could go back and take a turn ……. where everyone of us could see her smile one more time …
dont really have words to comfort u …..
take care -
Kay
“Damn there’s no God. Nothing but the devil persists.”
I am also not much of a believer in god. So I can understand what you may be feeling.
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sajjan
i dont have any words to make u feel good…..i can feel what happens when somebody close to us leaves us…..i cant just imagine the pain and loneliness….
i dont say may god give u strength(there is no such things like the damn god)….so i would like u to create strength to heal the pain though complete healing is not possible….i feel so sorry to know about this…..
take care dear -
k
hey,
i know how u feel. the feeling tht she’s still here n not gone. the way u can’t believe that she’s gone. n if i know u, she’ll never be gone. u’ll be talking to her in ur thoughts, seeing her in ur memories n going through all the ups n downs right in front of her. she’ll always be alive for you, as my mom’s for me. it hurts during those times that people remind u of her, thinking that they’re saying just the right thing to comfort u. people r just trying to help but they hav no clue what they’re actually doin. sometimes u wish them just to shut up n say nothing.n abt the “strength to go on..” well, u always have it in u. don know where it comes from. but everyone has it. just do what u feel like doin n time takes care of the rest.
luv u
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k
don know where ppl go when they’re dead. but i think they stay back with us. in our hearts. so that u can snuggle in for that warmth when u most need it. so that u always have someone to talk to even if u’re miles away from a single living soul.
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mrrdx
wish it be just a bad dream but when it becomes a recurring one, have to adapt to live with it. empty spaces and vacant places have been left behind which cannot be filled.. but they are to be accepted..
soche jasto hunna jeevan.
jasto bhogyo ustai huncha..
a small negligence can be big enough to end a life.. never take anything for granted….anything can end a life and save a life… -
Kay
Though it’s stark difficult to control oneself in this sort of situation, we should not forget that death is the only ultimate truth.
I too am unaware where does “life” go after passing away. Is there heaven sort of thing?
I pray for the piece of your alter ego’s soul.
Amen.
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Kay
Though it’s stark difficult to control oneself in this sort of situation, we should not forget that death is ultimate truth in the world with life.
I too am unaware where does “life” go after passing away. Is there heaven sort of thing?
I pray for the peace of your alter ego’s soul. For mukti in fact. This world is full of misery. So.
Amen
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all of Us
So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found? The same old fears.
Wish you were here.Lyrics from Pink Floyd
I even ponder where do we go after death…
I think she have now became a shining star in the sky watching us from above…she is always with us only thing is we cant see her…….i cannot feel what you felt at that time…but…..The world’s a roller coaster and I am not strapped in. Maybe I should hold with care,but my hands are busy in the air.(Incubus)
Things are not what they used to be
Missing one inside of me
Deathly lost, this cant be real
Cannot stand this hell I feelYesterday seems as though it never existed
timro hasilo muhar ko jhajalko jab auncha asoo ka dhara bahana thalchan……..
whatever we do only memory remains…
the life we’ve left is dedicated to her……………
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Bad Days, Chalega!!
Zadexpress
The TV should have been my preoccupation. But its not. The stereo then but amazingly it is not either. The FMs have nothing interesting at this time of the day which is 3:50 pm in my table clock. Maybe they do but I don’t know because I am not supposed to be home at this time of the day. I had a class to attend so I took the bus. Got a seat, lucky me! And the route changed from Tinkune, the hell with these rallies. I spent thirty minutes suffocating in the bus because of the same while coming home from college in the morning and now the bus is supposed to discover a new route to Ratnapark! I wasn’t angry then, just certain that I would reach my destination on time. Oh the optimistic me! So the bus headed towards Gaushala. The road to Purano Baneshwor was blocked. However the brave conductor removed the hurdle and the bus set rolling. I was glad. But as we reached the P.B Chowk the traffic policeman asked the driver to head to New Baneshwor rather than allowing it to take the Maitidevi route to Ratnapark. My temperature was on the rise. It kept escalating until we reached Baneshwor and I could take no more when the traffic there directed the bus back to the same goddamn route! What the …..! So, the passengers yelled but of no avail. I cursed my fate and got off the bus. Got on another and headed back home. An hour of journey to nowhere. An utter waste of time.
That’s life. That is exactly what it is like to live in the capital of this country. Ah..I just want to get this frustrating experience out of my system.

Chalega Mentality. That’s the Nepalese way of doing things. Good roads-chalega, bad traffic-chalega, good grades-chalega, bad grades-tyo pani chalega. We’ve gotten used to all bad things in life. And increased our We live through the good and through the bad. Change? You ask us. We’ll all yell YEAH! We want Change. But the change in reality is nothing more than the change in “Chalege” circumstances we face.You might differ, but I know you not. You might be yelling “No more Chalega, I don’t want to put up with this crappy system anymore” but you are somewhere unseen, unheard probably only doing that in the solitude of your room, in the safe territories of your mind.
Everyday is the same. Someday I walk out of home for college and it is the Araniko Highway closure because some driver was beaten up. The other day I am in Bagbazar and am informed this is the last bus back, no more when the last is literally exploding with people. The buses block the highway so what we walk on through the “Nali”. Oh, we’ve got soo many alternatives. So everything Chalega. I think we are immune to any goddamn bandas now, we are all comfortably numb to everything around us. That’s life. This is just enough of a change our so called Mahan Janaandolan 2 has brought. This is enough for me atleast to want anymore out of LOKTANTRA.
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sajjan
after reading this i bet the first thing comes to anyones mind is to salute u…though i do it first…..thumbs up dear zade….i also feel the same way u do….aba estai ho thikai chha bhanera ignore garne baani nepali(esp ktm’uits)harulai parisakyo….they just try to ignore the problem they are facing saying estai ho…what can we do and bla bla bla…..we dont emerge out to change the system we are running with….and who are we to change this????we are just nothing and no one….with no power and no wisdom enough to do it as well….nobody listens us and implementation of our ideas is out of question……banda ani andolan bhayena bhane nepali harulai k napugeko k jasto hune baani bhaisakyo…..sabai ko case ma….if u are heading somewhere and u reach there in time without encountering traffic jam…andolan…julus or something like that….u become surprised on urselves…achamma lagchha testo kei bhayena bhane…..let aside these bandhas…traffic jams are the main problem in the valley here….
people are mishandling the word “andolan for something” and why wouldn’t they if they are to face this type of system of the country?????if u read the news u can see here andolan, there andolan …here killing, there killing…. here strike ,there strike …..and all this damn things…..we are sick and tired of this…….
may be some time we all emerge out to solve these problems we are facing…..
lets hope for this
and this would happen some day
thinking optimistically is good…..keep on blogging….u rock……
take care -
Nonameplease
Bad time going on here too.
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sajjan
ya a bit lucky in this case….dont need to face those bandhas and jams over here…and i feel lucky in another sense as well…i dont need to face the dhuwa and dhulo of kathmandu….i can breathe fresh air over here…the best part over here is the environment….and about the mercedees logo….that mercedes logo might probably be the only thing they have saved …all other parts of the vehicle might have been changed….i bet there are no vehicles(mini buses on bkt route)newer than late 70’s……they should have been replaced a long time ago but those newars of bkt……tiniharule aafno route ma aru gadi ta halna didainan …tyo pani hataune ho bhane k chai garne hun……u see…sabai testai bus chan ni….
instead i give u a suggestion…..u dont need to walk muh from koteswor or jadibuti…..so u better take buses for koteswor or jadibuti and then walk home …ali ali exercise thapinchha timro legs lai…..
ani desh ko kura ta k garnu….sadhai estai ho….jwala samuha ra goit ko fight with maoists…with others…..k k ho k k….and the most disappointing thing is the YCLs….tiniharu le k socheka chhan…tiniharu ko bau ko birta ho ra yo desh jata pani hastachhep garnajane???????yo kura ma chai malai ekdum naramro lagchha…..usai ta maoist mann naparne tesmathi tiniharu le gareko testo kaam le garda jahai mann pardaina malai ta…..
anyways tiniharu ko k kura garnu.,….
u remember my suggestion….take care
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Prajwol
Like Dor Bahadur Bista said “Nepali and Fatalism”, you’ve now coined new word “chalega”. When you look these sort of things from abroad it seems insane, but people are still living simply because they adhere to “Chalega” . We are used to so many bandh’s, now how abt Chalega bandh?
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René
I am looking from far abroad and even farther outside, and I have to say it doesn’t really seem that insane.
As for adherance, that is always going to exist and so is “chalenga”….
But then aren’t we all just striving to step out of that box?
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Prajwol
Rene.
We all are striving to step out of that box, agreed. As far as being insane, it depends on how we define it. I don’t think in Georgia you have to encounter a road blockade because a passenger bashed a bus driver and the whole buses in the city stop operating, not just stop operating but blocked the way for other to pass. I don’t think in Illinois you have to worry if you are headed to the airport and there are mass rallies going on, blocking every access to airport. These incidents are not once in a life time, its happening almost every other day. I think every citizen has rights to a normal life, but there are so many varibles driving the uncertainities. Has your telecommunication or Internet service been stripped because some ruler wants to assume power unlawfully? We have encountered that. Looking at all these activities and many more (which is indefinite to explain) how can we say it’s sane. I know optimism is what we require, but it’s hard to ascertain that when we have to keep living in the same place for rest of our life, compared to someone who was just there for four months. Even though at present I live abroad but I was there for more than two decades.
Anyways, It was nice to hear a different perspective.
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René
I was not trying to say that my life in America may compare to Nepal. But, I do think that Nepal is not the only place in the world where problems such as there, exist.
There are also places outside of Nepal where worse things happen every day.
As for bad things happening, they are also all relative. What may be bad for one could be no big deal to another, but would that make it feel any less horrible to the person? No they would still feel like it was just bad.
Secondly, Do I know you? I find it odd that you would mention Georgia. I can see it would be easy to see that I live in Chicago, Illinois, but knowing GA is a bit odd to me.
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Prajwol
Rene,
I am definitely not picking on you, if I sounded that I am sorry. Many things happening around the world are far worse than what Nepalese have to endure. That’s why I said definition of insanity differs from each context. We all like to compare ourselves with sth better than sth worse, which is typical of human nature. Nepalese tolerating all these mishaps are certainly below par of basic living norm of a civilized country. And other places that you have mentioned are simply inhuman.
No, I dont know you. I went thru u’r resume, that’s how I figured Georgia
Peace……..
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annitya0
Rene is right about the things like that don’t happen only in Nepal. Just last week, we read about the outrage in Argentina from CNN. Train was late there and the people tried to burn the train and vandalized the shops in the stations. Many people got injured. ‘Shutdowns’ like ‘Bandh’s do also happen in countries like Italy too. But I’m not trying to justify that it is good. It is certainly bad.
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Bridim homestay( Day 2 Trip)
Zadexpress
Wasn’t listening to this song. But it was being repeatedly played in my head. Especially these “chalu” lines. And God knows why! But I like the “Bal matlab” attitude here: “We just don’t care…..
“Let’s go to the park
I wanna kiss u underneath the stars
Maybe we’ll go too far
We just don’t care
We just don’t care
We just don’t care………John Legend:(We Just Don’t Care)
We were on the way to Bridim. It is three hours walk from Syafrubesi. You can take your time and make it four/five, your wish, your pace. There were five or six people before me. Way ahead. I called out to her in the middle of the journey but received no answer. “Keti pakkai Tethrathum kai raiche” I concluded. Ha ha ha And as the walk progressed I was convinced of my own “hard-core-hilly-origins” too! Genetic, I concluded! The rest were at and equal distance behind me. I walked somewhere in between the two groups, in an unusual route feeling somewhat lost but good. Tiring journey though, gulped down bottles and bottles of water and was sweating like a pig obviously ( a short walk in KTM turns my face into a dark red tomato, so you can picturize my color status then!). The black t-shirt was not helping at all. On the way I picked up two rhododendrons!! Yes, I was finally able to accomplish my own “Afno laligurans afain tipaun” Aviyan.

Maile affain tipeko ho ke!
dui ota! yeah he he he-
kp
you are prolific bloger. i red some todey. i m also blog learn you.
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Deelip
Sounds really intresting.
Never heard about bridim before anyway. -
Reality Bites
Love to read everyword here ……..
Thanks. -
annitya
I’m still feeling bitter about your telling him to walk on the other side of the road.
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AiEmMe
i did not comment because i too did not enjoy zade shooing off the poor guy.
who is better the one who peeped you guys in the room or your friend who obeyed you/
yes, it’s true we need to change our attitude; we should not leave the disabled or differently abled people or even mentally retarded ones.
you reminded me one real story; i will write sometime later as an entry. thanks for giving me “blog ideas” (patrakaar haru lai sandhai “story idea” ko khancho hunchha ni jasari, malai blog idea ko khancho chha
)btw, you would have dealt with Jhamak. YOu missed the chance. I have noticed that the disabled hate sympathy. Hoina ta? (I am also sort of disabled ke. Dimaag ko disability chha. heheh
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annitya
wrong guess, juggy; but I just didn’t understand what was going on. I’ll try reading that post again. But it was not nice unless the guy had done something wrong.
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annitya
Well, if you don’t want to talk about it; I’m sorry for dragging you into it then.
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dhungana
going through this entry i m feling as if i am once again in Briddim expereincing the same fun, exicetement and a bit fear seeing that man who almost gave us a big shock peeping in our room while i was changing, i was agaun shocked shocked to see no curry in our dinner as i had expected good food that night. any way it was definately big fun and no dought that every moment we spent in bridddim will be memorable.
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Kishan
It was one of those memorable moment of your life while you were having the biggest (I hope I did not underestimate you) adventure. Do you know when I went to Frozen Lake (Gosainkunda; it was not frozen while I was there), I had to sleep in bed for 4 days. It was just a walk pure walk on Off-the-beaten tracks of the Langtang!!! So whatever you dare to do, will be a sort of Adventure there!!
Tara khusi lagyo yo blog padhera….. -
dawa
Dear friend,
Namaste!!!i am very happy to see about my village Bridim in your website.thank’s for your inform about my village Bridim.i also from bridim and my name is Dawa Tamang.
hope you can make friendship with me and keep in touch.you can also link my website is http://www.dawasnepaltrek.com
your sincerely friend,Dawa
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juggy 4:33 pm on May 30, 2007 Permalink |
I am wordless!!
But I hope You will make it large!! The life and everything!! I know I didn’t know her and my words won’t make much difference to what you feel; but still I wish you will feel good soon; feel her presence within the absence and make it your strength to move on!!
Keep living my friend, Keep on living; and surely make it large!!
Best wishes!!
keshuvko 9:49 pm on May 30, 2007 Permalink |
Last time while commenting, I had no clear idea about the tragedy you were talking about. Later when I got to know that she IS the the unfortunate one, I really felt sorry.
Somewhere I had written sth like how different we (humans) are from other beasts.
“They live to fight (=fight to live) for food and mate. And, we also for our ego.”
Yes, memories are a sweet thing. We need some inspiration to live. Let’s find some even amid the misery and hard knocks.
Life should move on.
aart 7:34 am on May 31, 2007 Permalink |
hello!
While surfing in the net I discovered your profile and I also love the work of Paulo Coelho!!!! Do you know that he is launching his new book, The Witch of Portobello, through his blog
http://www.paulocoelhoblog.com?
I found it out because i’m inscibed to his newsletter http://www.warriorofthelight.com/engl/index.html
it’s simply wonderful!
have a nice day!
maliak47 8:04 am on May 31, 2007 Permalink |
Beautiful… I haven’t read something so capitivating in a blog in quite sometime. (Since all my bloggers have dissappionted me by not writing and even when they write, by protecting it with a password)
I agree with you about memories… fer me personally, even bitter ones are good enough to be stored because they teach us a lot, and remind us of how we’ve grown…
I’m sorry about the death of your friend. But life goes on, it’s painful, but it goes on. It has to…
malika47 10:06 am on June 2, 2007 Permalink |
Oh darn… i just realised that I’d commented on your blog without realising (even after having heard the news on TV) that your friend was Pravina.
Reality Bites 11:06 am on June 6, 2007 Permalink |
You should try to live alone. Think that just natural process……….Memories can create a touch with someone……….that lasts forever………Life is still to be continued………..Feelings really makes us so much near and near…….
Thanks.
'D' 2:42 pm on June 11, 2007 Permalink |
You can live a hundred years and not have lived at all. Sometimes in one moment you live a hundred lives. In one spark of time you rise above human existence and soar through the ways of eternity.
My speculation has little value when human experience is concerned. Our experiences are our masters and mentors. No book or university education can teach us what our experience does. Each of us has the priviledge of interpreting our exprience and you are doing the same. It has taught you to ‘Live’. There can be no grater inspiration.
'D' 2:50 pm on June 11, 2007 Permalink |
BEST OF LUCK FOR YOUR EXAMS.